We found an excellent poem that puts into words the reach and power of addiction – and we think it’s worth a read.
Many of conflicts that we hear at Alpine Center stems from a misunderstanding of the effects that substance abuse has on someone’s whole life. We’ve had clients who tell us how angry they are with themselves after another relapse, or after they find themselves unable to get away from the habits they’ve been trying to break. This self-anger can lead to a shame cycle, which is damaging to everyone – especially those who are in recovery.
And then we often hear from frustrated families who are having a hard time understanding how this person that they love has changed so drastically. They don’t know how the lying, disappearing for weeks and hurting themselves started. Maybe they don’t understand how relapse could happen after they’ve been clean for so long, because in their mind once they stopped they shouldn’t want to start again.
Not understanding how addiction changes someone’s every day, thought, and action leads to the type of frustration that slows down healing. And when your support system doesn’t understand, it may prevent you from being open with them. We found an excellent poem that puts into words the reach and power of addiction – and we think it’s worth a read.
Ms. Crystal Meth
By Samantha Raynolds
I destroy homes. I tear families apart. I take your children, and that’s just the start. I’m more valued than diamonds, more precious than gold. The sorrow I bring is a sight to behold.
If you need me, remember; I’m easily found. I live all around you, in school and in town. I live with the rich. I live with the poor. I live just down the road, and maybe next door.
I'm made in a lab, but, not in one like you think. I can be made under your kitchen sink. Or in your child's closet, and even out in the woods. If this scares you to death, it certainly should.
I have many names, but there’s one you’ll know best. I’m sure you’ve heard of me: My name's Crystal Meth. My power is awesome. Try me, you’ll see. But if you do, you may never break free. Just try me once, and I might let you go. But if you try me twice, then I own your soul.
When I possess you, you'll steal and you'll lie. You'll do what you have to, just to get high. The crimes you'll commit for my narcotic charms will be worth the pleasure you'll feel in my arms.
You’ll lie to your mother. You’ll steal from your dad. When you see their tears you must not feel sad. Just forget your morals, and how you were raised. I’ll be your conscience. I’ll teach you my ways.
I take kids from their parents. I take parents from kids. I turn people from God. I separate friends. I’ll take everything from you; even your good looks, and your pride. I’ll be with you always, right there by your side.
You’ll give up everything; your family, your home, your money, your friends. You’ll be all alone. I’ll take and I’ll take, 'til you’ve no more to give. When I finish with you, you’ll be lucky to live.
If you try me, be warned: THIS IS NOT A GAME. If I’m given the chance, I’ll drive you insane. I’ll ravage your body. I’ll control your mind. I’ll own you completely. Your soul will be mine.
The nightmares I'll give you when you're lying in bed. And the voices you'll hear, from inside your head. The sweats, the shakes, and the visions you'll see; I want you to know these are your gifts. From me.
By then it’s too late, and you’ll know in your heart that you are now mine, and we shall not part. You'll regret that you tried me. (They always do.) But you came to me, not I to you.
You knew this would happen. How many times were you told? But you challenged my power. You chose to be bold. You could have said 'no,' and then walked away. If you could live that day over, now what would you say?
My power is awesome, as I told you before. I can take your mother and turn her into a whore.
I'll be your master, and you'll be my slave. I'll even go with you when you go to your grave.
Now that you’ve met me, what will you do? Will you try me or not? It’s all up to you. I can show you more misery than words can tell.
Come, take my hand, and let me lead you to Hell.
The imagery in this poem is powerful and strong. It has resonated those who are facing the battle of addiction every day. Having such an accurate description of what you, or your family member, are going through right in front of you can be eye opening.
When you just relapsed, even though you have no idea why (and you definitely hated yourself every second you were doing it), or if your loved one just lied to you for what seems like the thousandth time – read this poem. Think about how these substances can control every minute, every decision. It’s not just something that anyone can kick on their own. It’s something that will take effort, help, and knowledgeable support.
And we want to help you if you find that you’re struggling to understand yourself. Or to understand your loved one. We believe in giving you the tools to overcome your addiction, and we’re always here when it seems like it will win again. We believe that your addiction doesn’t have to control your life. But we also know it will take work, and understanding guidance, to get there.